I’m not a regular blogger,
I do not claim to be.
I am not what you think I am
Or even what you see.
I hate many things about my life,
Ones I’m supposed to like.
I hate pink, I hate disarray;
I love black and I loves bikes.
I do not know everything,
But I know I know enough;
To take me through each day
Whether easy or tough.
I believe one can fight
And give up fighting still;
But at the end of the long, long road
Destiny triumphs over will.
With all of me I choose to love,
And in the same manner I hate.
One can hurt me all they want
I forgive, but never forget.
I’m not a regular blogger,
I do not claim to be.
Sometimes I’m not good enough,
If you read on you’ll see…
Wednesday, 3 October 2007
Faith forsaken
I have seen a lovely flower,
wither up and die
I have seen a little boy,
throw back his head and cry
A girl was raped and to her
justice was denied
a lonely man, whose wife felt
their divorce was justified
I have watched clouds cry,
in sheets of pelting rain
I have tried to understand,
a jilted lover’s pain
To have felt courage falter
and faith break in strife;
having witnessed negativity i
bow to the futility of life
wither up and die
I have seen a little boy,
throw back his head and cry
A girl was raped and to her
justice was denied
a lonely man, whose wife felt
their divorce was justified
I have watched clouds cry,
in sheets of pelting rain
I have tried to understand,
a jilted lover’s pain
To have felt courage falter
and faith break in strife;
having witnessed negativity i
bow to the futility of life
Thursday, 26 April 2007
Noceo
My mind lies entrapped
within the
confines of my soul.
Ravages of spirit
conjure a mosaic of images.
Emotions have
dethroned rational powers
and in the face of
broken silence,
the mirror screams tonight.
The cobwebs have been
distorted in their shape
and the symmetry
has been replaced
by my
confusion.
It’s a new moon
night, no moon
tonight.
Howls die down….
Wednesday, 25 April 2007
Echoes of Eternity
The dirndl whipped about in the storm
as she ran across the beach
away from the lighthouse.
Lightning ripped apart the sky
annihilation of the night.
They twinkled, the stars,
On her skirt.
Slipping, falling, stumbling
bleeding she made her way
to the waiting solace.
Endless, bottomless wait as
echoes of eternity haunt
her ringing ears
as the blood on her
wrists run in a deluge
to the depths of the
being of her existence.
Dithyramb songs float
in tarnished space.
The yellow-orange flames
of dusk have come down
in a cascade of efforts
to escape the dungeons.
Dying, praying, screaming
as the voices of the night
drown out her soulbeats.
In the infidelity of life,
the scars have opened up again.
But there, it waits
for the Morse code flashes
on the raging sea.
Froth is the heaven, the echo
she hears everyday
running through the bubbling
foam and farther
farther still, till at last
she was swallowed by the
embrace of the night.
The dirndl whipped about in the storm
as she ran across the beach
away from the lighthouse.
******************************************
The light turned green.
I crossed the road amidst
The echoes of eternity.
as she ran across the beach
away from the lighthouse.
Lightning ripped apart the sky
annihilation of the night.
They twinkled, the stars,
On her skirt.
Slipping, falling, stumbling
bleeding she made her way
to the waiting solace.
Endless, bottomless wait as
echoes of eternity haunt
her ringing ears
as the blood on her
wrists run in a deluge
to the depths of the
being of her existence.
Dithyramb songs float
in tarnished space.
The yellow-orange flames
of dusk have come down
in a cascade of efforts
to escape the dungeons.
Dying, praying, screaming
as the voices of the night
drown out her soulbeats.
In the infidelity of life,
the scars have opened up again.
But there, it waits
for the Morse code flashes
on the raging sea.
Froth is the heaven, the echo
she hears everyday
running through the bubbling
foam and farther
farther still, till at last
she was swallowed by the
embrace of the night.
The dirndl whipped about in the storm
as she ran across the beach
away from the lighthouse.
******************************************
The light turned green.
I crossed the road amidst
The echoes of eternity.
Sunday, 15 April 2007
Late last evening....
Stupid net connections…. This was written last night itself. Couldn’t put it up till now…
Sometimes one wakes up in the morning and doesn’t give the day a second thought. Its just that it seems like another day, the usual routine of classes, the daily dose of frustration, the constant endeavour to do something useful but ending up spending hours at beloved frustu sipping iced tea and talking…. Talking…. Today, or rather yesterday(since I see its past twelve) was one of those days which showed no inclination to be different from the rest.
But sometimes stuff just happens. We decided to go down to kaup…. The five of us- Swapnil, Neelav, Anamol, Fernon and i. it just popped out of the blue and we decided that the first Saturday afternoon after the sessionals was the best day to put our plan to good action…. So down we went. Till now nothing really seems extraordinary. We flit about in the water, dodging the waves and splashing each other. It was high tide and the waves were pretty forceful. We were having a wonderful time.
Then it started getting dark. It went on that way until we realized that we were in a secluded part of the beach and the reason why there wasn’t any light was because there apparently was a power failure. We were out of the water by then, each one convincing another of the demerits of reaching the hostel late( these dratted perm restrictions!!).
It hasn’t rained out here in a very long time, just once since the beginning of this sem and that too not like tonight. The white sands, the wind howling in my ears, the feel of clothes soaking on my back, lighting in the horizon, the beacon of the lighthouse and the faint rumble of thunder in the distance. I didn’t feel, hear or think of anyone or anything else.
The sights and sounds of the moment were engulfing me in their magnanimity. A feeling of strange emptiness washes over me when I realize that I am powerless… in the face of everything that was here tonight. It doesn’t stop there. My heart spews out questions that my mind refuses to answer. It just wishes to remain numb, like the soul of the sea. Even though the sea roars and grumbles with all its might, the bottom line is that its just a defence mechanism. Inside , its just as scared, as confused, as unsure as I am. Or maybe I am just rambling on…..
I’ve always heard that kaup is beautiful, that it is an amazing place to be. But when I was actually there tonight, the rain pelting down on my back, my hair whipping about in the wind….. that’s when the beauty hit me square, full and large. This is one of those few occasions when I feel that words are inadequate to convey what I was feeling. That no matter what I write here tonight, one has to be there on an evening like this to realize what it feels like.
So we run on the sands in pitch darkness all the way back to the road only to find that there are no auto-rickshaws around. So we do what strikes us best. We walk. In the flashlights of a couple of 1100 phones(I always bless them at such times) we make our way back…. Fortunately we get ricks after a ten minute trek. The rest can again be termed as the dregs of an ordinary day. There are few things in life which have made me stop dead in my tracks…. These images that run through my head are a few of those…
High tide
Clouds
Spray on waves
Swapnil
Salty breeze
Lighthouse
Anamol
Wind howling
Frozen fingers
Fernon
Being cold
Rain
Neelav
Thunder
Sea
Beacon
There are days which just seem ordinary… they aren’t.
Sometimes one wakes up in the morning and doesn’t give the day a second thought. Its just that it seems like another day, the usual routine of classes, the daily dose of frustration, the constant endeavour to do something useful but ending up spending hours at beloved frustu sipping iced tea and talking…. Talking…. Today, or rather yesterday(since I see its past twelve) was one of those days which showed no inclination to be different from the rest.
But sometimes stuff just happens. We decided to go down to kaup…. The five of us- Swapnil, Neelav, Anamol, Fernon and i. it just popped out of the blue and we decided that the first Saturday afternoon after the sessionals was the best day to put our plan to good action…. So down we went. Till now nothing really seems extraordinary. We flit about in the water, dodging the waves and splashing each other. It was high tide and the waves were pretty forceful. We were having a wonderful time.
Then it started getting dark. It went on that way until we realized that we were in a secluded part of the beach and the reason why there wasn’t any light was because there apparently was a power failure. We were out of the water by then, each one convincing another of the demerits of reaching the hostel late( these dratted perm restrictions!!).
It hasn’t rained out here in a very long time, just once since the beginning of this sem and that too not like tonight. The white sands, the wind howling in my ears, the feel of clothes soaking on my back, lighting in the horizon, the beacon of the lighthouse and the faint rumble of thunder in the distance. I didn’t feel, hear or think of anyone or anything else.
The sights and sounds of the moment were engulfing me in their magnanimity. A feeling of strange emptiness washes over me when I realize that I am powerless… in the face of everything that was here tonight. It doesn’t stop there. My heart spews out questions that my mind refuses to answer. It just wishes to remain numb, like the soul of the sea. Even though the sea roars and grumbles with all its might, the bottom line is that its just a defence mechanism. Inside , its just as scared, as confused, as unsure as I am. Or maybe I am just rambling on…..
I’ve always heard that kaup is beautiful, that it is an amazing place to be. But when I was actually there tonight, the rain pelting down on my back, my hair whipping about in the wind….. that’s when the beauty hit me square, full and large. This is one of those few occasions when I feel that words are inadequate to convey what I was feeling. That no matter what I write here tonight, one has to be there on an evening like this to realize what it feels like.
So we run on the sands in pitch darkness all the way back to the road only to find that there are no auto-rickshaws around. So we do what strikes us best. We walk. In the flashlights of a couple of 1100 phones(I always bless them at such times) we make our way back…. Fortunately we get ricks after a ten minute trek. The rest can again be termed as the dregs of an ordinary day. There are few things in life which have made me stop dead in my tracks…. These images that run through my head are a few of those…
High tide
Clouds
Spray on waves
Swapnil
Salty breeze
Lighthouse
Anamol
Wind howling
Frozen fingers
Fernon
Being cold
Rain
Neelav
Thunder
Sea
Beacon
There are days which just seem ordinary… they aren’t.
Friday, 13 April 2007
a few minutes to go before friday the thirteenth leaves us.... funny. its supposed to be ominous, but half of the people do not even remember its this date today. if you remind them, they'd probably be scared of something going wrong...its all in the mind. well, so long as my day was lik any other, i'm indifferent to it.or i could say, saturday the fourteenth is unlucky for me....
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